The Brilliance and Screw-ups of Mr. Lasseter

For this post we had to comment on the success and failure of the second years.

In his failure section, Patrick talked about how miserable his 4th period class was. In a class of 20, about 7 or 8 of them went to alternative schools or were expelled. He thought that after these problem kids were gone, he would have better order and a more productive classroom. He was wrong. Instead, an additional six boys in that class started making trouble. They were talking back, talking during class, frequently getting kicked out, and generally playing around everyday. They didn't pass the first semester and were failing the second but they still had time in last nine weeks to pass. In the end, Patrick gave up and stopped caring if they passed or did their work. He was happy if they just stayed quiet writing something. His other students, however, did pass.

Patrick sees his failure in giving up as a teacher. He thought he should put more effort into those students who were failing and acting out. I understand where Patrick can be hard on himself and think that this was a failure, but before the final straw, I'm sure he did alot to try and motivate those kids. As a teacher, especially in the schools MTC works with, many of the kids go to school because they have to and it's something to do. (I learned this in summer school because many of the parents' eyes lit up when they discovered that they could send their kids to summer school, even if they wouldn't get credit for it. I mean, free daycare? Who's going to pass that up. I digress). So if they are not necessarily performing well, often times it's because they just don't care or there are circumstances outside the classroom that causes them to act out. And that can be very frustrating as a teacher; trying to reach someone who constantly rejects you. I can see where you'd just want to check out. So, in the end, I wouldn't go so far as to call it a failure. I think it's just something that comes with the job.

On a better note,

In his success story, he spoke of a student named Gelisha. She was really quiet and opened her mouth only to say, "Hello, Mr. Lasseter" She flew under the radar the first semester and was one of twelve who failed the class. (Her average was 60%). Second semester, Patrick reached out to her more and found that she had some learning difficulties. She severely struggled when reading. He got her working with other students and taking tests after school when she needed more time. They worked on reading comprehension and other "basic" skills. And he checked on her each class to ensure that she was getting the concepts. Gelisha passed second semester with a 72.

Patrick says his success story isn't one to knock anybody's socks off. But I think it should, especially to those who know the difficulties of teaching. It can be very difficult to motivate an underperforming child to do better because they listen to their peers, and even some adults, call them stupid. In this case, Patrick took an active role as a teacher and got close enough to his student to realize that she couldn't read well. How many of her teachers knew that but passed her anyway just to get her out? No, she didn't get an "A" but her improvement shows just how much of an impact a dedicated teacher can make on a student. She was willing to talk to other students and stay after school, those are successes in itself.

Good job Patrick. I'll know you'll do an awesome job next year.

One Thursday Afternoon

Dr. Boyd spoke to us about the relationship between education and poverty. When he presented his findings of median household income compared to test scores, I was very surprised. New York ranked about number 18 in median household income (a shocker in itself) and number 34 in the percentage of state-wide poverty. I must admit with all the multi-millionaires living it up in Manhattan, I expected New York to be much higher on the income scale. Mississippi was ranked last (50) in both of those categories. What Dr. Boyd found from these numbers is a correlation between poverty percentage/median income and test scores. States that ranked lower in median household income and higher in poverty percentage tended to perform lower on the 4th grade reading exam.

But as I sat there reading these stats I couldn't help but notice that the states doing the worst in these categories are southern, former Confederate states. The majority of these states are rural, some with very poor residents. But then I think of the urban poor in the inner cities of places like New York, Chicago, and Detroit. They probably have just as many poor residents as these southern states except more densely populated, therefore the percentage of poverty would be lower in states with urban poor neighborhoods. I guess what I'm ultimately trying to say is that I don't completely trust his findings. He is a brilliant man and has an excellent resume but I think there are more things that need to be controlled for or taken into consideration before using the data to find questionable correlations.

With a Heavy Heart. . .

This is the blog that I wrote for ASIP. They asked what challenges we face that complicates or affects our job as interns. Here is my response...

Alot of times we are asked to tell how challenges within our internship affect us. I don't really have any challenges though. We have an amazing boss and all of our work is managable. So for this post I'm just going to talk about something relevant to my job.

Being in Mississippi has been a learning experience for me in so many ways. I've learned about Mississippi's rough history, where they are now, and where they are trying to go. Many of our fieldtrips through the Delta really open up my eyes to disparities in education that are present in the United States. People often joke about living "on the wrong side of the bridge" or "the wrong side of the tracks" but I've never actually seen it. Going to Greenwood and Indianola, you can see the blatant differences between the white neighborhood and white schools which are on one side of the train tracks and the black neighborhood and black schools on the other side of the tracks. So let me change my previous statement; I do face challenges in my internship. It is extremely difficult for me to see this and not know what to do. I struggle with this everyday that I am down here. How do we make it better? How do we make the teachers stay? How do we prevent teen pregnancy and break the vicious cycle of poverty and illiteracy? What are the answers to these questions? I don't know. And that is my greatest challenge; wanting to help but not knowing how I can make an impact in a system that's so broken and damaged.

This post got a response in which a fellow Amherst College student in an educational internship presented the following quote, "The best way to predict the future is by creating it."

As I sat there reflecting on it, I realized that it's true. I keep asking how? how? how? can we change "the inevitable." But we, as concerned citizens, have to take matters into our own hands rather than accept that these inequalties exist and that some people just have to deal with a poverty cycle that started with their great grandparents and seem to never end. We have to find a way to change the course these kids are on. And I think there are many programs out there that seek to do just that (like Teach for America or Mississippi Teacher Corps). We just need to figure out how to magnify them so we can reach more kids.

Code Name: 20 LMs, 7 UTs, and 1 IT

About the title: This post definitely needs this explanation. I didn't want to have to do this but the title was too long to actually write it out. So this is what it means; 20 Lost Minutes, 7 U-Turns, and 1 Illegal Turn (in the wrong direction down a one-way street) This was our first hour in Jackson, courtesy of Mr. James Benjamin Guest XII. We were forced to drive around for 20 minutes because he was lost. We made a total of 7 u-turns and he managed to drive down a one way street going the wrong way. Someone should get Ben a GPS system or something. But I digress.

We saw four speakers on Saturday; Ward Schaefer, Torsheta Bowens, Lincoln Dall, and Jerry Mitchell. This post is really supposed to be dedicated to one of them but I've decided to take matters into my own hands and write a little bit about each of them. They all made the trip to Jackson worth missing some of the MTC volleyball championship/farewell bbq so I'm going to let each of them shine.

WARD SCHAEFER: How do you teach in a classroom without proper walls? What do you do when you cannot get adequate support from your district or administrators? These are some of the things Ward had to deal with while teaching his first year. Despite all the obstacles, he managed to survive the year at one of the toughest schools employing MTC teachers. Even after going through all of this (including a school change after his first year), Ward stayed in Mississippi. He wants to use the Jackson Free Press to address issues facing the state and work to make effective changes to state legislation. Looking at Ward, I think back to the conversation we had at Baskin Robbins/in the car/in our livingroom. I don't think it matters where the teachers come from. Look at Ward, Dave, Father Dall, Ben, and many more I'm sure. They may not be in public education anymore but they have stayed and make significant improvements in this state. I commend them all for working to make a better Mississippi even though it is not their original home.

TORSHETA BOWENS: If you are a teen mother, your life is over. Give up all your dreams and aspirations because you can never make anything of your life. Torsheta rose above this common view of teenage pregnancy prevalent in MS. Not only did she graduate high school but she went on to college and participated in one of the most competitive teaching programs in the country. Torsheta is an inspiration. It further exemplifies my belief that we cannot write these kids off as screw ups or damaged goods. Yes, people are victims of their circumstances but that doesn't mean that they cannot rise above them. They just need a good head on their shoulders or a push in the right direction.

LINCLON DALL: Father Lincoln Dall is probably one of the most interesting people I have ever met. Listening to his life journey was almost unreal. I wonder how someone can do so much in a lifetime and be effective at everything they do. Father Dall's story of his prison ministry touched us all. He even brought one of us to tears as he tried to fight back the tears himself. His story further exemplified my point about how we treat our prisoners. Once they are behind those walls, they are forgotten. No one bothers to see if they are properly fed, cared for, or that due process is ensured. I applaud Father Dall for listening when no one else would. He probably helped to strengthen that man's spirit.

JERRY MITCHELL: I must admit that after taling to Mr. Mitchell I wanted to go home and watch the Medgar Evers movie so I can see if I can spot his 3 pens :-) Jerry was probably my favorite speaker of the day. I actually prefer when speakers just come with stories rather than philosophical thoughts of education and life in general. He kept it real with us and I really appreciated that. I can't wait until his movie comes out. And Mr. Mitchell, if you read this by some chance, I want advanced tickets of the movie and all that good stuff :-)

ISTJ (Intelligent, Sneaky, Trustworthy, Juvenile) ;-)

So we had to take this personality test; Myers-Briggs Personality Test (MBPT). After answering about 50 questions, I've been classified as an ISTJ, which really stands for "introverted, sensing, thinking, judging". We have been told to reflect on our outcomes. Honestly, I don't think these tests tell you anything. It's like reading your horoscope; sometimes you feel like they've got you on the money but other times they are so far from the truth that you just have to laugh to yourself.

ISTJs are commonly thought of as inspectors. "They are quiet and reserved individuals who are interested in security and peaceful living. They have a strongly-felt internal sense of duty, which lends them a serious air and the motivation to follow through on tasks. Organized and methodical in their approach, they can generally succeed at any task which they undertake.

ISTJs are very loyal, faithful, and dependable. They place great importance on honesty and integrity. They are "good citizens" who can be depended on to do the right thing for their families and communities. While they generally take things very seriously, they also usually have an offbeat sense of humor and can be a lot of fun - especially at family or work-related gatherings."

What does all this mean to me? Nothing. Yes, I feel that some points of the ISTJ profile fit me but I'm sure other personality types can identify with some of these points as well. In all honesty, I just think this test was created by two men who have nothing to do. Despite my cynicism toward this test, it did nail one important personality trait of mine. It accurately characterized me as an introvert. I remember telling Ben as I lay in agony in the hospital bed :-) that I have never initiated a conversation. Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating a tiny bit. But I would say about 99.1% of all my relationships (whether friends, acquaintances, etc) were initiated by the other person. I cannot figure out why I am like this. If someone speaks to me, I most certainly engage them in conversation but if it were left up to me, I would probably smile a friendly smile at them and keep going about my own business. This is something that I need to work on. I need to be more proactive with regards to meeting new people rather than reactive.

And I also agree that I have an awesome sense of humor and can be really fun to be around when you get to know me! So maybe this test isn't completely uselss. :-)

The Sky is the Limit?

As my freewrite, I want to talk about my abilities. I am not particularly good at anything. I can't sing, can't dance, not an athlete or a nobel prize quality writer and most definitely not a poet. I'm just me and I'm okay with that. I don't have to be a world-class anything.

People always say, "the sky is the limit! You can do/be whatever you want!" Yes, these are great words of encouragement but when you reach a certain age and have explored so many different fields, hobbies, and extracurriculars, you begin to know your limits. Face it, you cannot do everything! And people need to learn to accept that. I accept my limits and that there are certain things I cannot do. This post may seem a bit out of line to some people but I feel like I should be able to write about whatever I want in a freewrite.

MTC staff, administrators, team teachers, and second years constantly tell us that MTC teachers are not going to change the world and will not change Mississippi overnight. So they drill into first year teachers that they need to realize this and know thier limits. There it goes again! "Know you're limits!" "You cannot be these children's knights in shining armor," they tell them. "Don't get mad if you don't see change," they say. So in this grand attempt to save their teachers from spiraling into depression, they make sure that they know their limits from the beginning.

With all that said, I think it is unreasonable to require me to write a poem, when I cannot. To me, it's like making someone swim across a pool when they clearly can't swim (Gerald Penny, Amherst College Class of 1977). Yes, I'm being a little drastic when I make that comparison but all the same, poetry is a unique form of expression like art or music and everyone is not good at it. The Sky is the Limit when you are young. They sky is the limit when you're finding yourself. Once you've become who youe are, there's a plate glass ceiling.

Misery

About the title: So Ben is forcing us to write a poem as one of our blog posts. Cruel? Yes, very. Especially to those who cannot write poetry. No, it is not true that everyone has a poet inside them. The words that come from a person's mind and flow onto a page do not always make sense. They are not always beautifully or cleverly articulated. Let's face it; some people write trash. With that said, here is the poem I an being forced to write. The title describes how I felt that day.

Misery

One Saturday morning,
rolled out my bed.
Couldn't stop the pounding,
coming from my head.
Should have stayed at home,
but went out instead.

It's just female nature.
I know I'll be okay.
So on to Indianola,
for a catfish lunch that day.
Couldn't stand the smell,
had to get away.
So I snuck off to a corner,
to keep the nausea at bay.

All that didn't work,
still thought that I would die.
My life flashed before my eyes,
and I tried not to cry.
Misery is the best word
to describe that moment.
Looked at my life and realized I didn't own it.


Misery Part II

pain.
misery.
dehydration.
life.
lies!
death.
end.


Happy now Ben? You forced me to produce this mess.